Soul.......Unpleasant to others....

Me, My Heart,...and also My Soul..........
...........................................filled with...."FILTH".........
as if all the Dirt..in one BOWL...



Noone who Likes, Noone who Cares......I'm soo Bad that noone Dares...
...........to come, to touch,and to seee......
There's a person whom all Hate....and thats "ME".....

They Pray, They Hope that one dat Me,
....This Dirty Creature may Flee...............
....From this World that I do not Deserve......

Coz.....Bad People They Say;.....

Get Back What to others they "SERVE"!

Stone Hearted....Yes ...Its Me!

Looking into My Heart,..........

I do percieve.

That noble thoughts ......

......................................Do I conceive?



Do I have Emotions............?

Do I have any Feelings..........?

No, I dont't have them.........
.........................coz I am " Stone Hearted" ..

What is Love and Care,........I dono.....
About Sympathy, and Affection.......I dono

Coz......I am a " Stone Herated"....

Harsh words ,......Cold Feelings........
Rough Patches .....and........Devily Dealings..
This is what I am always doing............
This is what I am always planning...........

Coz .....ha ha......I am a stone Hearted........




to e contd.................

LOVE..............

Love puts beauty in a day,
Love is, where my inspirations lay.

But where to find love , is the main concern,
For the need of live, the candel burns.

Love, have you find it yet?
Is it your spouse,kids,or pet?

Love is the need of the hour, my friend,
Its not the fashion or the latest trend.

Giving and not taking is the meaning of Love,
It should be a reality and not a bluff.

Love makes a Life worthwhile,
Love can take you through Miles.........

My dear, feeling of Love , so fragile and Pure,
Deep in my heart, this feeling Lure.

It lies in the very depth of my heart
To express Love is not Flattery but art.



to be cont....................

Mein Kabhi batlati nahi, par is Duniya se darti hu mein Maa.
Auro ki to keh nahi sakti, par tu meri parwah karti hai na maa.

Tujhe sab hai pata meri maa, Mein kitni akeli hoo na maa.

Sab rishte jab ek ek kar ke dil tod ke chale diye,
kehte they jo mein unka hissa hu,woh bhi dhokha dete rahe,
mein bhi kitni bholi thi na maa, tujhe sab hai pata meri maa.

vishwas tha jin rishto pe mujhe unhone hi tora dil mera meri maa
bhai ho ya behan, sab ne mujhe chora meri maa.
Tujhe sab hai pata meri maa, tujhe sab hai pata meri maa.

Kya koi nahi hai jo meri parwah karega meri maa
jo mere nazook se dil ko todne se darta hoga maa.
jisko yeh ehsaas hoga ke dil mein bhi dard hota hai na ma .
Tu hi bata kispe karu bharosa tune aisa kyu banaya mujhe Maa.
tujhe sab hai pata meri maa.

Sochti hu mein har baar dhokha khane par,
yeh akhri baar kisi ne toda ho yeh dil,par fir bhi jaata hai dokha mujhe mil
kis mitti ki bani hu mein kyu nahi chor sakti sabko maa
kyu bhool jaati hu mein ke sirf tu hi mera khudha hai meri maa
tujhe sab hai pata meri maa

Papa ki jab yaad aati hai to lachar apne ko pati hoo mein Maa
Woh apni jeet ki khushi mann mein hi rakh jaati hu mein Maa.
Sochti hu agar hote papa to meri har khushi mein gale mujhko lagate meri Maa
Taras rahi humein par unke haath koapne sir pe Maa
Par kisko yeh parwah hai na Maa
tu to sab jaanti hai na Ma, tujhe sab hai pata meri Maa

Rishto se ab kuch chah nahi Sab rishto mein dokha hai na Maa
dil mera sabne tod dia, par shayad yahi hota hai na Maa
Tu mujhe kabhi chorna nahi yahi soch ke mann yehbahut rota hai na Maa
Ho jaungi bahut akeli mein, agar tu bhi chor gayi meri Maa
jaate hue ek aawaz dena mujhe, mein bhi tere saath chalungi meri Maa
Mein kabhi batlati nahi par is duniya se bahut darti hu mein Maa
Tujhe sab hai pata meri Maa,tujhe sab hai pata meri Maa

Chor ke akeli mujhe kabhi bhi na jaana meri Maa
sang apne apni beti ko ungli pakar ke le jaana meri Maa
darr jaungi warna mein yaha tere bin na reh paungi meri Maa
Tujhe sab hai pata meri Maa, tu sab jaanti hai na Maa

love u Mom......
Miss u a lotttt papa................

Gone

No one knows what I'm feeling
My heart is pounding
I'm full of sadness and rage
I need someone to please let me out of this cage
I have seen so much and felt so much pain
But no one knows what I feel
I do not tell my hardest ties
Hold my hand and look me in the eyes
Take me back when there were no worries or whys
I miss the free flying
I miss letting my hair down and running around
Someone help me up and take me away from here
I'm ready to be on my way
Let me close my eyes and fade with the day
I hurt deep down inside
So many mixed emotions
Take me by the hand and walk me with me by the ocean
Help me
I'm falling into the hole
I'm scared I don't want to lose my soul
The lights are dimming
Your voice is growing faint
I want to say I love you
I will miss you so
Hold me close and whisper in my ear
Tell me you love me
I will always be near

One Happy Moment With You

You're the only reason I keep living each day.
You're the only one who helps me find my way.

Sometimes I don't know what I would do without you by my side.
Sometimes I think I might have just laid down and died.

But then I look and I see your smiling face.
But that joy only comes and for a moment, takes my sorrows place.

YOU AND I

My world you are,
my love extreme.
Depth I've never known.
The way you look at me,
your eyes deep.
Stay up all night
romance, love,
conversation.
Asleep I fall
In your arms,
safe, warm, content.
You buy me roses for
no reason at all,
call me to say "I love you.
"Cologne on my pillow,
I miss you when your gone.
We share memories
past, present.
Always there for me,
you give me strength, support,
meaning to my life.
Together forever we'll be.

WISHFUL THINKING

I wish I were in your arms
Keeping me away from harm.
I feel so safe in your embrace,
And the feeling is so good to see your face
As I look deep into your eyes,
The world around me disappears,
Because all I see is you and me,
Lost in love is how I want to be.
I wish I could feel your kiss,
Against my tender lips.
To taste your lips so sweet,
Every single time we meet,
Makes all my dreams come true,
Because I can never go on without you.
The love I have for you,
It's hard for me to explain,
Because sometimes words can't express
This emptiness,That I feel when we're apart.
You have this hold on my heart.
So don't ever let me go,
I don't wanna be alone,
That's why I wrote this little poem,
To let you know what's going on,
Deep inside this heart of mine,
Before I run out of time.
So please let my wishes come true,
Forever I would stay with you.

I WISH YOU COULD TELL ME YOU KNEW

Walking down the aisle, my daddy with me
Tears in my eyes and an ache in my heart
I prayed to God, asked him why we had part
I begged and I asked please leave him with me
But the Lord took the man I dearly loved
I had hopes I had dreams of you being here
I pictured you holding my baby so dear
I saw you escorting me down the aisle
But that thought has been gone for quite a while
I hoped and I dreamed you’d stay here so long
That maybe a cure would come along
But your every heartbeat began to fade
God’s decision was final it had already been made
I wish I told you I loved you once more
But you passed too quickly through God’s open door
They tell me you knew how much I loved you
But I wish you could tell me you knew

THE CONSUMING

Pain and sorrow
Forever my silent companions
Quietly reminding me Of the unfinished
The incompleteI haven't yet done
What I dreamed I would do
The desire burns fiercely
In the depths of my soul
I've put it on hold For the other parts of my life
People who don't understand
Even lie by my side at night
The pain and sorrow
Of all of mankind
It seems to consume me
So quietly it consumes me
Yet so completely it ruins my life.

FEELINGS (ONE OF A KIND)

I feel love, but I cannot show it
And cannot say it
I feel fear, butI was frightened out of showing it long ago
I feel sad, but
My eyes have forgotten how to cry
I feel everything is my problem To help to solve, but
My help is not wanted
I say things I feel I should, but
They are taken the wrong way
I feel I must show friendship, but
That is not wanted
I feel I can help, but
I am pushed away
And locked out
BecauseI don't belong
I am lonely
For I am different
Distant
And one of a kind.

You and Me Will Be Together Again

I miss you every moment of everyday,
I think about you all the time.

I hope you are okay and doing good.
I can't help but want to be with you,

and I hope to see you soon.
I wouldn't mind dying tomorrow or even this very second because I know that I would be with you again.... Forever

Why Did He Stop Loving Me

Why did he stop loving me?
How could he forget so fast?
Does he still feel love for me?
How could such sweet love not last?
I've learned I can't believe my eyes
Nor trust the instincts of my heart.
I look upon a sea of lies
Too wide to cross, too deep to chart.
And yet I am condemned to sail
Upon that sea awash in pain.
Love hides its truth behind a veil
That none may know they love in vain

Turning and Twisting

Mixing and matching,
Twisting and turning,
Hoping and praying,
Dreaming and considering,
Never knowing yet always knowing,
Wanting to, yet not wanting to
,Mixing my heart,Matching my soul to yours,
Twisting fate with the flick of the wrist,
Turning my life over,Hoping that it would end,
Praying that it never would stop,Thinking it was over,
Wishing that it wasn't,Dreaming of its coming,
Considering letting it steal within
Never knowing if it's true,
Always knowing that it's there.
Wanting to live in the light,Not wanting the light to come,
The love of another
The dreams of someone close,
Remembering what you used to feel,
Can it come back if you pray so?

Slow Tears

I look up
as a tear rolls slowly
down my cheekI think about better days
and wonder if I'll feel that way again
you look at me
with those eyes I know so well
always serious, so deep and insightful
as though you're always in control
But not today
not now
Now you look so scared
like for once you don't have the answer
I gaze at you
looking deep into those hazel eyes
Hoping to understand
why you've said those things you did
I wonder for a moment
if this is all a dream
if I shall wake in the morning
and be relieved
you look at me
with a confusion I have never seen
slowly pull me towards you
and wipe the tears from my cheek

simple things remind me of Our Love!

Simple things remind me of our love:
The sun slant just as when you kissed my hair;
Each time our songs hang lonely in the air;
Voices growing, dying as they move;
Emptiness that strangely we can share;
Nor do I miss you when at once you're there.

HEART, CAN YOU ANSWER?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you do when the world has away from you and everybody are so cold to you?
What is it that keeps you all warm?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you survive when all seems lost and
never will return? What is it that keeps you alive?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you forgive when the wounds are not all the way healed?
What is it that makes you forget?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you love when all love bring is lose and grief but rare its happiness?
What is it that you have down below?

O Heart, O HeartHow do you care when everything seems so mean and dreadful?
What is it that you are always so aware?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you cry when everything rips apart
and around you its all dark?
What is it that you're so calm?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you thank when a tragedy
happens after a tragedy?
What is it that you're so thankful no matter what?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you remember when its been long ago that you've almost lost everything?
What is it that keeps all those memories inside?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you choose when out of a hundred you only need one,
when you stand on a 4-way stop and you choose your path?
What is it that helps you decide?

O Heart, O Heart
How do you answer when you are asked so many questions and the answer is nowhere to be found?
What is it that talk without words?

AT NIGHT

At nightAt night I lay and think of you hoping my wishes and dreams come true
At night I wonder can this be the end is this all that's left
At night I wish we could go to the way things were
At night I lay and cry about the things that happened and how it all ended
At night I lay and think of us, I mean you and I
At night I realize there's no more us
At night I dream of us together again
At night I wish for us to be together again
But in the morning I realize it was all
At Night

BROKEN HEART

i say i'v prepared myself for the worse but the worse isn't gonna be breakin up, its gona be just loosin him and not layin in his arms, and not feelin the touch of his lips anymore, or the texting eachother untill early hours of the morning, or lieing on your bed and watching films, or anything like that. I dont even think we will be friends. I think that when its gone, thats it, its over, its all going to be gone. The laughter, the smiles, the caring about someone and knowing he care about you, the belonging to someone and having you belong to me, pointing and sayin 'he's mine', everything will be gone, everything except for the memories, the memories that have no tomorrow, or end, always burning brightly like you, you'll be an old flame that keeps burning brightly, always and forever. its a shame i cant say the same about us. The pain will fade but the memories will last forever. always in my heart, just where you used to belong. you'll always have a peice of my heart, you took it when you told me you loved me. But why say it in the begining if you knew you'd break my heart? I'll get over the pain slowly, it'll only hurt for a while, it'll ease after a while, but i suppose there will always be that little bit of pain thats labled 'he did that to me' 'it was him that broke my heart', but its just life, it goes on, slowly each day, like a heart. I thought my heart couldnt possibly break anymore then it possibly could, but then you came along and fixed every tiny shattered peice back together, i dont know how and i dont know why, all i know is that you did. But its broke once again thought you wouldnt do that to me, but its just lies everything, just a broken heart and lies, i dont think i could possibly handle anymore lies or another broken heart. I'll never love the way that i have done ever again, i dont want another broken heart.......you've become a part of me you'll always be right here

Missing You!

i've been living my alone
trying to get you out of my life
but after all this time
i can't help myself but miss you
you're once a dream that came true
an illusion that turned to reality
but suddenly, things turned differently
the way they used to be
untill such time i have no choice but to let you go
you're the reason for my sleepless nights
coz you keep stayin' on my mind
i can't help myself from crying
coz i'm missing you so much.....
... all the pain & sadness are bound inside my heart
all the memories are still preserve in my mind
i miss you so much
coz i can't hide the fact that i'm still in
love with you
my life will never be the same again
now that you're gonei'll be trapped in this loneliness forever
I thought this was a letter
I would never have to write,
I hoped my tongue was something I could bite.
I've realized its just something I cannot do,
Here are my feelings, just a few.
First, I'm still so In Love with you,
after all this time,
You told me the same, then left me, what a crime.
Time has passed, everyday you're on my mind,
Your love will be with someone else now, what a bind.
I'll be so jealous, she's going to be the luckiest girl I know,
I can't do this friendship thing anymore, so off I go.
The pain of losing you is still fresh in my brain,
everyday my heart feels the pain.
Will we ever be together again,
i say as I sob and mopeas each day passes,
I lose a little more hope.
I'll always LOVE you Dear hold these words true
Don't hate me for this, this is what pain is making me do.
My heart is broken in so many a part,
Do I still have a place in your heart?....

VALLEY OF TEARS

Few there are to walk beside you
through the valley of tears and sorrow.
More the times, you walk alone,
than the times that they befriend.

Lonely is the journey there
And dark the jagged painful path.
Your tears they flow upon the stones
That rip away the bloodied flesh.

The light ahead, it slowly dims
As deeper down the path sojourns.
To hold a hand along the way
Might keep the feet upright that stumble.

Alone you see this path that ends;
Beyond the valley, a light, it glows
With angel guiding as you walk;
Last mile of life not walked alone



Cannot go forward, cannot go back,
Wishing that I could drop dead in my tracks.
I know I am leaving something behind,
And it is tearing my spirit inside.

Choices have always made me aware
Of contradictions in me - so unfair!
It seems that it all has to come down to me.
I wonder if someone my struggles can see?

Self-hatred, self-torment - familiar sight!
Alone, be alone, and from it all hide -
That's my first impulse that won't get me far.
Is that way for many, or is it my star?

Maybe I should have simply there stayed,
And prevented the so unknown fate
That chills me and makes me so scared.
Who knows how I would have otherwise faired?

But my life has passed in change after change,
Now in security I feel too strange,
And my restless heart does make me go on.
Moving and shifting is ever my song!

TRUTH HURTS

Why didn't they care for me.......?????
My inside they never did see,
My heart cries......my body is sore,
Paralyzing me to the innermost core,
The anger inside me can take no more.
The frustration, the misery and pain,
Driving me crazy...turning me insane,
Escaping away, do I have what it needs??
And finally I accept the things the way the are,trying to live, trying to bear.....!!!

ONE LAST TIME

Paint me a pretty rainbow and color it with reds;
Bring to me a dream to spin with golden gilded threads
And sing to me a song that lifts and puts on me a smile
And when you're walking through my mind, stay in there awhile.


Place upon my lips a soft blown kiss and if you'll be so kind;
Leave behind a memory to impress upon my mind.
Slowly back away from me when walking out the door
And tell to me once more, what you're leaving for.


Plant a rose of deepest pink to grow outside my window
And after removing the thorns;a cutting upon my pillow.
Make the moon again to shine and the stars to twinkle;
Whisper to me a word of love that brings my eyes to sparkle.


Come with me and dance once more; a slow romantic waltz,
And paint again a rainbow bright before reality assaults.

A VOID

What can fill that empty space
That seems a hollow pit.
When something there is missing
And nothing seems to fit.
How do you fill the emptiness
And satisfy the inner hunger;
When all in life has left you starved
But no where's found the answer.
Outside yourself, you start to look
But still there stands the void.
The little things you used to love,
No longer seen enjoyed.
Don't talk to me of God,
For I'm his and he is mine,
but even though I know him;
I'm still not feeling fine.
Tomorrow, I'll go searching,
And tell you what I find
But if my search should prove in vain;
It will have satisfied my mind

"It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing"

Hope life's been good to
yousince you've been gone
I'm doin' fine now--I've finally moved on
It's not so bad--I'm not that sad
I'm not surprised just how well I survived
I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive
I can't complain--I'm free again
And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath--to forget

Don't think I'm lyin' 'round cryin' at night
There's no need to worry, I'm really all right
I've never looked back--as a matter of fact

It only hurts when I breathe
Mmm, no, I've never looked back--as a matter fact
Hurts when I'm breathing
Breaks when it's beating
Die when I'm dreaming
It only hurts when I breathe

You are not there!

What do I do, now I've reached the edge?
The cliff is steep to the plain below.
Miles upon miles of emptry air
And no hand will I hold, but your hand
and you are not there!
What do I do when smothering black
Of night engulfs me ... coldly dark
So dark I tingle with sudden fear
No arms do I need but your arms
And you are not there!
What do I do with a life that tells
the end of the world in a darkened mist
But still must keep senselessly on
No love keeps my heart, but your love
And you ... you are gone!